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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| Champion ’stallion’ missing vital equipment |
| 2003-09-29 |
| No, this isn’t about Michael Moore. Read on: A prize-winning ’stallion’, tipped for a lucrative life on a stud farm, has been found to be missing some vital equipment. Clydesdale colt, Black Prince, has been stripped of several awards he won in Scotland after it was found he’d been castrated as a foal. Yep, just as you’re about to hit easy street, someone rips your balls off. Among his honours were a blue ribbon at this year’s Doune and Dunblane Show and a prize at the National Stallion Show. That made him eligible for a place in The Stud Book, the Clydesdale horsebreeders’ main reference. His virility came into question only when his owner, Kevin Cargill, decided to sell him to a breeder and a vet’s inspection was requested. A vet informed the surprised parties the two-year-old had been castrated as a foal, says The Times. "They weren’t the only ones who were surprised, Wil-l-l-l-bur!" Robert Hamilton, president of the Clydesdale Horse Society, said the organisation had no choice but to remove the awards. "Put simply, the necessary ammunition wasn’t there - and no balls means no awards," he said. That is so-o-o-o true in so many walks of life. Mr Hamilton said prize judges, who were representatives of various fairs endorsed by his society, had made a mistake that, although obvious, was easy enough to make. "When horses are on display they often retract their testicles. You cannot see them, and judges are not at liberty to start groping horses’ balls." You can always tell who the judges are at these shows: they have a horseshoe print on their faces. And a happy look. |
| Posted by:Steve White |
| #5 Just change the horse's name to "Black Jacques Chirac"! |
| Posted by: Baba Yaga 2003-9-29 8:43:29 PM |
| #4 Wait till the European Court of Hippic Rights hears of this. There'll be hell to pay when Brussels learns how disrespectfully the Scots treat EUnuchs. |
| Posted by: Bulldog 2003-9-29 1:59:34 PM |
| #3 In a word: Neuticles Don't leave home without 'em! |
| Posted by: Anonymous 2003-9-29 1:13:01 PM |
| #2 Well, a testicle check *is* part of dog shows, but a very small number of people cheat by having their vets insert fakes. And yes, the judges do hope that the owners & handlers of breeds like Giant Schnauzers and the livestock guarding dogs have trained their animals to accept the exam! |
| Posted by: rkb 2003-9-29 1:05:04 PM |
| #1 If I were judging a horse show, the testicle check for Clydesdales would be on the honor system. |
| Posted by: Superhose 2003-9-29 12:57:05 PM |