Edited for maximum spittle value:
Iraq's parliament held an emergency session on Wednesday with loyal deputies pledging to lay down their lives for President Saddam Hussein as a deadline for a U.S.-led attack neared. "We'll sacrifice our blood and souls for Saddam," several legislators chanted, waving their fists in the air and drawing applause from others in the chamber as the session started.
| Okay by me. Dontcha love it when they make faces and jump up and down? |
Echoing defiant statements from the top Iraqi leadership and Saddam's own family, legislators rejected a U.S. ultimatum for their president to leave the country within hours or be overthrown by an invasion. "It is unthinkable for Saddam Hussein to leave," Speaker Saadoun Hammadi told reporters after the session, which concluded with lawmakers sending a letter of allegiance to Saddam and vowing to defend Iraq.
| "Yes, by damn! A letter! We're gonna send a letter! Take that, you Merkin imperialists!" |
"The people of Iraq, who gave us this responsibility by electing us, stand today as one rank, as one voice, as one rifle against the criminal aggression of the U.S. and its allies," parliament said in its letter to Saddam. "We pledge to you that we will follow the path of heroism and martyrdom and we will all be martyrs defending Iraq."
| "You may rely on the fact that when this is all over, each and every one of us will be heroically dead, just like you." |
In a separate news conference, Iraqi Information Minister Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf said U.S. and British commanders were deceiving their troops by predicting an easy victory over Iraq. "This is a stupid lie they are telling their soldiers. What they are facing is definite death," he said.
| "We'll slaughter 'em! We'll murderlize 'em! Hrowf! Hrowf!" |
In parliament, Hammadi said Iraq was not the country that would accept what the U.S. administration dictates. "We reject and denounce it and we are all standing together behind our leader, and we're ready to defend our land. The fate of invaders is the same — failure and the curse of history."
| "We'll show 'em, just like we showed all the others. Like the Arabs." |
A succession of deputies, some in traditional Arab dress, some wearing funny hats, most in Western-style suits, addressed the chamber, unanimously rejecting the U.S. ultimatum and pledging loyalty to Saddam. Some warned the United States would face "unexpected" reprisals if it went ahead with its pledge to invade. One deputy also called on Muslims to attack U.S. interests across the world, while others called on Bush to go into exile, one denouncing him as the "pharaoh of our time."
| "Yeah. Sammy ain't gonna get out of Dodge! You get out of Dodge! Howdya like them apples, huh?" |
"The whole world has a right to say to little Bush: step down you rabid criminal. Step down you pharaoh of our time, you Nero... before you burn America and spread more discord in the world!" bellowed deputy Khaled Abdel Aziz Salim.
Now, how many of these deputies do you suppose we'll find hiding under their beds when we get to Baghdad? |