Article

2017-05-21 -Lurid Crime Tales-

Indian woman cuts off doinker of ‘religious guru’ over rape attempt

[SCMP] An Indian woman cut off a man’s penis after he allegedly tried to rape her at her house in the southern state of Kerala, police said on Saturday.
"Aaaiiieee! I am unmanned!"
The 23-year-old law student was at her residence in the state capital Thiruvananthapuram late on Friday when she says she was attacked by the 54-year-old man, who had claimed to her family to be a religious guru.
"Hello! I am a renowned holy man!"
"Well, step right in!"
"Hrarrr! C'mere, Cutie Pie!"
"She used a knife in her defence and cut off his penis," district police chief G Sparjan Kumar said by phone. "The man, Hari Swami, was rushed to the nearby government hospital in a serious state."
Other than being dead, there isn't a state much more serious than having you crank sliced off.
The local media reported that Swami was in a stable condition after undergoing emergency medical procedures at the local hospital.
"Uh... What happened to me?"
"I got good news and bad news, Swami. The good news is that you ain't got Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever."
"What's the bad news?"
The woman claimed the man had been assaulting her for several years, according to Kumar, who said police had started the paperwork but haven't done much else against Swami for sexual offences against a minor and rape.
"How about this one, chief? 'Section 432, assault with a dead weapon?'"
Police said the girl’s parents, who live at the same house, were unaware of the assaults by Swami.

Posted by Fred 2017-05-21 00:00|| || Front Page|| [12 views ] Top

#1 "Look Mom! I just did the first Indian sex change operation! Lets call Swami Caitlyn!"

Posted by Heriberto Panda4834 2017-05-21 06:21|| 2017-05-21 06:21|| Front Page Top

#2 :-)

Posted by trailing wife 2017-05-21 11:23|| 2017-05-21 11:23|| Front Page Top

#3 Yes, and his mother was a whore to dwarfs!

Posted by Alaska Paul 2017-05-21 15:19|| 2017-05-21 15:19|| Front Page Top

#4 She was a little short with him.

Posted by JohnQC 2017-05-21 16:54|| 2017-05-21 16:54|| Front Page Top

#5 'Cutoff date' ...redefined.

Posted by Besoeker 2017-05-21 16:58|| 2017-05-21 16:58|| Front Page Top

#6 Here comes Swami
Got his pecker in his hand
He's a one-ball man
And he's off to the Mandir-o!

[Five points extra credit to the one who knows where I ripped that off from! :-) ]

Posted by gorb 2017-05-21 17:40|| 2017-05-21 17:40|| Front Page Top

#7 "I said NO!"

Posted by Barbara 2017-05-21 18:27|| 2017-05-21 18:27|| Front Page Top

Posted by Pliny Glons2836 2017-05-21 19:37|| 2017-05-21 19:37|| Front Page Top

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