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Home Front: Politix
Mitt Romney, We Hardly Knew Ye
2023-11-01
[Federalist] Last month, Mitt Romney announced he will retire from the Senate after one term. Romney, who is 76, cited his age. That was undoubtedly a major consideration for a guy with a platoon of grandchildren.

It’s also true that Romney is unpopular with Utah voters and had no real chance of reelection after becoming the most prominent elected Republican antagonist of Donald Trump. With Romney’s 30-year political career ending with a whimper, there would naturally be a forceful attempt to shape his legacy as something other than a failure.

Fortunately, Romney already made plans for this. The Atlantic’s McKay Coppins, also a practicing Mormon, was already beavering away on a Romney biography that was sure to be sympathetic. Sure enough, very soon after Romney’s retirement announcement, The Atlantic ran a juicy excerpt adapted from the prologue of the forthcoming book. While the excerpt was sympathetic to Romney, in some ways it defied expectations.

The tableau it paints of Romney is something of a caricature. A luxury condo in the Watergate was too painful a commute to the Capitol, and Ann Romney doesn’t like spending time in D.C., so he’s living alone in a $2.4 million townhouse on Capitol Hill. He passes the time by watching Ted Lasso reruns on his 98-inch television while eating salmon sandwiches slathered in ketchup because he doesn’t like salmon. (When it comes to food, the septuagenarian Romney, who has declared his favorite meat is "hot dog," seems to have the maturity of a 7-year-old.)

When that doesn’t stave off the boredom, he invites over a reporter who will keep him company late into the evenings while he "nurse[s] a morbid fascination with his own death, suspecting that it might assert itself one day suddenly and violently," brags about how his compulsive exercise habits are superior to those of his colleagues in the Senate, and breathlessly recites a litany of petty grievances about his fellow Republicans.
Related:
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Mitt Romney: 2023-10-29 Former Vice President Mike Pence suspends his 2024 presidential bid
Mitt Romney: 2023-10-29 Pence hit with cluebat, ends campaign for the White House after struggling to gain traction
Posted by:Besoeker

#11  I think ketchup on salmon is a sure indication of him being Mad as a Hatter.

"One pill makes you Romney, and one pill, Delecto. And the pills that binders give you, don't do anything at all."
Posted by: swksvolFF   2023-11-01 14:08  

#10  Ken Buck (RINO-CO) just announced he won't seek re-election. Rumors also say Kay Granger (R-TX) will not run for re-election. Both opposed Jordan for speaker.
Posted by: M. Murcek   2023-11-01 14:06  

#9  GOPe Retirement:

Isnt that when their true RINO colors come out?

The book deal - democrats never get book deals to trash all the other democrats. He probably has a CNN political commentator job lined up.

You know the game.
Posted by: mossomo   2023-11-01 13:53  

#8  Zelensky will send a fruit basket to his retirement ceremony.
Posted by: Super Hose   2023-11-01 13:05  

#7  He can get together with Cheney and Kinzinger to reminisce.
Posted by: Abu Uluque   2023-11-01 12:24  

#6  A better lede reference might have been from
"Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead"
Posted by: Mercutio   2023-11-01 09:48  

#5  "Acute narcissism and fractured ego prevents actual retirement and Walleye fishing trip to Wisconsin."

Yeah, the press powerboats and kayaks full of stringers would pretty much spoil any decent Walleye fishing grounds.
Posted by: Mullah Richard   2023-11-01 07:19  

#4  Should read:

"Acute narcissism and fractured ego prevents actual retirement and Walleye fishing trip to Wisconsin."
Posted by: Besoeker   2023-11-01 05:02  

#3  His wife doesn’t even want to be with him, sounds like he has no friends and the only people who stop by are paid journalists looking for a clickbait quote from the stooge for the left. And his sudden death prediction sounds more like a veiled threat of self inflicted harm.
Posted by: Airandee   2023-11-01 04:58  

#2  ...there would naturally be a forceful attempt to shape his legacy as something other than a failure.

I wouldn't call it a failed political career; I'll just call it a lame / weak one, AKA typically RINO. Thanks for Romneycare in Massachusetts, dickhead!
Posted by: Raj   2023-11-01 01:02  

#1  Nor did we care to.
Posted by: Skidmark   2023-11-01 00:11  

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