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-Signs, Portents, and the Weather-
More Californians Forced To Run Extension Cords To Neighboring States
2019-10-31
[Babylon Bee] CALIFORNIA‐Deprived of luxuries like power and freedom, more and more Californians are being forced to run extension cords over to their neighbors in adjacent states.

A caravan of migrant Californians was seen traversing the deserts separating the state from its eastern neighbors, towing hundreds of miles' worth of extension cords.

Californians knocked on random Nevada and Arizona residents' doors and asked if they could borrow some power to charge their cellphones, power their espresso machines, and run their tanning beds. They were surprised to discover how nice people were in other states, saying things like, "Sure, neighbor!" and "No problem. Do you want to borrow any guns or cactuses?"

Unfortunately, the increased power demand caused the power grids in Arizona and Nevada to get knocked out, so they had to run extension cords over to New Mexico and Utah, respectively. Then their power got knocked out, and their neighbors' power, and so on and so on until all the states on the East Coast were forced to run extension cords over to Europe, but they were electrocuted to death because of the water hazard.

Californians are now looking for an alternative energy source, such as rubbing balloons on hipsters' beards.
Posted by:Besoeker

#13  How about putting generators on those stationary bikes at fitness spas?

That’s how the Dutch family that hid my mother during the war powered their radio. Except for the fitness spa part, of course.
Posted by: trailing wife   2019-10-31 14:58  

#12  This might be funny if it wasn't at least half true. Individual Californians have no need to run their extension cords to neighboring states because PG&E and SoCalEdison do it for them. A great deal of California's energy comes from out of state. I remember a few years back when a worker at an Arizona power plant flipped the wrong switch and the result was a power outage all over southern California. I got to leave work early that day, after shutting down all the computers in the computer room before the battery backup ran out of juice.
Posted by: Abu Uluque   2019-10-31 14:54  

#11  And then there's this
Posted by: Mullah Richard   2019-10-31 12:12  

#10  I would think gyms could take themselves off of the grid in that way, but they aren't gonna help their neighbors let alone the state very much.

CA should have pushed for solar power on every rooftop long ago. We have the sun, and a typical roof could provide enough power for the house beneath. You just need batteries or wind power to get your through the night.

Instead they pushed for massive solar farms because you have to keep the union workers of PG&E employed.
Posted by: rjschwarz   2019-10-31 11:45  

#9  How about putting generators on those stationary bikes at fitness spas? I know a thing or two about fitness bras spas.
Posted by: jpal   2019-10-31 11:18  

#8  I'm going to sign the petition to recall Newsom. I identify as an undocumented Californian.
Posted by: Matt   2019-10-31 11:12  

#7  Buy Generac stock.
Posted by: Uleck Spererong9442   2019-10-31 09:11  

#6  The Green's wonderful utopia.
Posted by: 3dc   2019-10-31 07:02  

#5  ^No thank you. This is the off season.
Posted by: Secret Master   2019-10-31 01:40  

#4  Maybe they could wire up all the ecstasy-trippers at Burning Man?
Posted by: Lex   2019-10-31 01:13  

#3  Unfortunately, the increased power demand caused the power grids in Arizona and Nevada to get knocked out, so they had to run extension cords over to New Mexico and Utah, respectively.

Unfortunately, they figured out Texas has plenty power. Now we can't them to leave Grumble.
Posted by: Pancho Flerens6518   2019-10-31 01:10  

#2  Bee = more real than reality

NYT, WaPo, CNN et al. = Wonderland, Fantasia, Le Royaume du Shitshow
Posted by: Lex   2019-10-31 01:00  

#1  Shitshow Part 160
Posted by: Lex   2019-10-31 00:11  

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