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Home Front: Culture Wars
'My Healthcare Is None Of Your Business,' Says Woman Who Demands That You Pay For Her Healthcare
2019-03-03
[Babylon Bee] LOS FELIZ, CA‐Local woman Sarah Harper declared Friday that her healthcare is none of your business or the government's business, though she wants the government to take more of your money to pay for it.

Harper posted a series of tweets Friday proclaiming how "men don’t have a say" when it comes to women's healthcare, and also that you should just "shut up and pay for it."

Harper made sure to let everyone know that her healthcare should be free and blocked anyone that disagreed with her. She was very clear that her healthcare is absolutely none of the government's business, though she did demand that the government take other people's money to pay for it.

"Why does it matter how many times I’ve had a Planned Parenthood appointment this year?" the woman said. "It’s not your business where I go for birth control or of my lifestyle choice---you just need to support it, no questions asked." She also stated that the term "healthcare" can be broadly defined as anything from basic checkups to killing her own baby.

"Hands off my uterus!" she declared, while metaphorically reaching her hands out for your wallet.

Harper is also reportedly in favor of doxxing people who come out against having the government control and pay for her healthcare. "People who prevent women from exercising their basic healthcare rights should have their private lives exposed so everyone can know of their bigotry," shed added. "Their basic privacy needs to become everyone’s business."

"Look, you have no right to know about my healthcare. Just hand over the money and no one gets hurt," she said.

At publishing time, Harper still had failed to realize that a government that pays for her healthcare has total control over her healthcare.
Posted by:Besoeker

#5  The article may be parody, but the phenomenom it describes is real.

It actually is fake, but accurate.
Posted by: charger   2019-03-03 14:41  

#4  Wow. Usually the headline is the zinger; this is the whole article.
Posted by: swksvolFF   2019-03-03 13:23  

#3  #1, yeah, Babylon Bee is just killing it, but in fairness they're operating in the most target-rich environment of modern times.
Posted by: Matt   2019-03-03 11:42  

#2  "I'm the State!" - King Kull
Posted by: g(r)omgoru   2019-03-03 08:28  

#1  Punching far above their recorded weight with this one. I would so love to visit the offices of the Babylon Bee and meet the editorial staff.
Posted by: Besoeker   2019-03-03 05:52  

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