[Babylon Bee] SALT LAKE CITY, UT‐Mitt Romney, incoming senator for Utah and follower of Joseph Smith, lectured the nation in an op-ed Tuesday on the need to reject morally flawed leaders.
The man who has devoted his life to the teachings of a con artist encouraged the nation to examine its leaders to see whether they are worthy of our devotion and respect.
"A president should demonstrate the essential qualities of honesty and integrity, and elevate the national discourse with comity and mutual respect," wrote the man who follows Joseph Smith, a false prophet, notorious polygamist, and scam artist. He pointed out that the president hasn't shown himself to be honest or forthcoming in his dealings with opponents and other countries, while Joseph Smith's own prophecies failed to come true over and over again, and while the Mormon Church continues to deceive its members by covering up its past.
Romney took Trump to task for his immoral lifestyle, slamming him for being divisive, destructive, and sexist, though the first prophet of his church consolidated power throughout his life in order to marry more women and eventually deceive millions into believing a false gospel.
To close his opinion piece, Romney urged the president to live a morally upstanding lifestyle, "and maybe look for wisdom to lead the nation by staring at stones in a hat."