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-Lurid Crime Tales-
Pakistani teen arrested for sexually assaulting chicken
2017-11-16
[ENGLISH.ALARABIYA.NET] A teenager who sexually assaulted and killed a chicken was arrested by the Police in Hafizabad, Punjab in Pakistan.
Five words: Ew. Ew. Yuck. Yuck. Yuck.
The 14-year-old allegedly assaulted a hen on November 11 in his village near Jalalpur Bhattian area, reported Tribune.
"She's a good-lookin' chick!"
According to a report filled by the owner of the bird, the boy stole, sexually assaulted and killed it on the spot. The man named two locals as eyewitnesses in his complaint.
"I seen it!" he cackled.
The teen was arrested after a medical examination of the chicken confirmed the assault and that the boy confessed to the crime.
"If the egg can get out, I can get in!"
The police report sited ‘unnatural offence.’
"So why'd you kill her?"
"I couldn't bear the thought of her being with another man!"

Sharia law requires killing the violated animal after the violation. The meat may not be sold in the same village, but the next village over is fine.
Posted by:Fred

#10  It's feathers were not covering it's ankle.
Posted by: newc   2017-11-16 22:28  

#9  Must of been watching some German films.
Posted by: bbrewer126   2017-11-16 20:51  

#8  This video seems most appropriate.
https://youtu.be/PENJxl-THS8
Posted by: Anguper Hupomosing9418   2017-11-16 19:47  

#7  Totally not his fault.

"Say, cock of the walk," she squawked blackly.
"Got just what you're cravin', compactly
Served up with no trimmins
For less than them wimmins..."
"Ma'am, that's what I'm after, exactly!"
Posted by: Zenobia Floger6220   2017-11-16 17:59  

#6  The late, great, Slim Gaillard has something to say about this:
Posted by: Alaska Paul   2017-11-16 10:53  

#5  
Posted by: Frank G   2017-11-16 09:16  

#4  That was fowl.
Posted by: DarthVader   2017-11-16 09:13  

#3  He killed it out of fear it would squawk.
Posted by: Rob Crawford   2017-11-16 08:24  

#2  “Better an old hen than pullet.”
Posted by: Skidmark   2017-11-16 07:24  

#1  Pakistani Teen Hollywood's Harvey Weinstein Accused By Chicken of Sexual Assault

There, fixed that for you.
Posted by: Hupeting Sforza8196   2017-11-16 04:48  

00:00