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-Lurid Crime Tales-
Today's Idiot
2016-08-23
A beauzeau who broke into a house, drank a bottle of rum then fell asleep on his victim's sofa has been checked in at the Gray-Bar Hotel.

Dawid Grzelewski, 32, broke into Paul Hatton's home in Bournemouth, Dorset, while he [Hatton] was at work.

Mr Hatton received an alert to tell him that his burglar alarm had been activated so he went home, took pictures of the sleeping burglar, ejected him from his flat then called police.
"You need a place to stay? The bobbies'll give you one."
He was soon spotted in bushes by police nearby with a bag of amphetamine in his mouth and given matching bracelets.

Prosecutor Simon Edwards told Bournemouth Crown Court: ‘Mr Hatton received an alarm telling him the burglar alarm in the flat had been activated.

‘At 8.30am Mr Hatton went to the flat and found the defendant asleep on the sofa in the lounge.
"Who are you!?"
"Zzzzzzzzzz!"

‘He took two photographs of him on his mobile phone. Next to [the defendant] was a hammer and a large screwdriver.

‘He had drunk a quantity of rum belonging to Mr Hatton.'
"Where's the rum gone?"
Mr Edwards added: ‘Police attended and a blood-stained tissue was found on a worktop.

‘The defendant had injured himself. [The blood] matched the profile of this defendant.'
"Here, end table! Hold my rum and watch this!"
Grzelewski, of no fixed abode, admitted charges of burglary, possession of a class B drug and breaching a suspended sentence.
"It's a fair cop. You got me."
He asked for one further domestic burglary and three commercial burglaries to be taken into consideration by the judge.

He was placed in durance vile for 60 weeks and will be extradited to Poland when he is released.
Posted by:Korora

#5  Anything can happen when you empty the hotel mini-bar!
Posted by: Skidmark   2016-08-23 10:35  

#4  Subsidised migration creates jobs*!

*For Police and Prison-Service employees.
Posted by: Bright Pebbles   2016-08-23 09:41  

#3  LOL, last graph had me go into PC joke shock.
Posted by: Shipman   2016-08-23 09:16  

#2  Maybe his mommy didn't love him enough
Posted by: Cheaderhead   2016-08-23 09:11  

#1  Another poster child for Breixt?
Posted by: Procopius2k   2016-08-23 08:43  

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