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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Tenn. man says cows licked $100 in damage to house
2009-12-10
Cows-with-GunsRogersville, Tenn. (AP) -- A Tennessee man's homeowners insurance apparently doesn't cover "acts of cow." Jerry Lynn Davis called the Hawkins County Sheriff's office on Thursday, complaining that a neighbor's cows had been licking his house.
EAT MOER CHIKIN
In the process, Davis says the curious bovines did about $100 in damage by ripping off a screen window, cracking the glass and pulling down a gutter.

The Kingsport Times-News reports that Davis' home is just a couple of feet from a fence enclosing the cows' pasture. They managed to poke their heads through to lick the house, though a deputy's report did not indicate what made the house so tasty.
Deputy Chris Funk was able to contact the cows' owner, who said he'd take care of the problem.
And that's what is happening in my neighborhood.
Posted by:Deacon Blues

#16  And it still isn't part of my vocabulary, tw.

I intend to forget it post-haste. :-(
Posted by: Barbara Skolaut   2009-12-10 23:09  

#15  anal coring

A phrase it never occurred to me would ever become part of my vocabulary.
Posted by: trailing wife   2009-12-10 22:25  

#14  i think if the damage was only $100, i would have kept quiet about it.
Posted by: USN, Ret.   2009-12-10 22:12  

#13  #10
surgically precise removal of the reproductive organs and anal coring.

Sounds to me that someone has been screwing that anamal and didn't want to leave any DNA.
Posted by: Redneck Jim   2009-12-10 21:53  

#12  You should have gone to Chik-Fil-A instead of Burger King - Cows take revenge.
Posted by: Chief   2009-12-10 21:32  

#11  I blame Muck4doo
Posted by: Frank G   2009-12-10 21:09  

#10  Clear sign that aliens are not present in the area.
Posted by: Procopius2k   2009-12-10 21:07  

#9  Premarinated.
Posted by: Nimble Spemble   2009-12-10 20:53  

#8  Legitimate concern in the oil patch. A cow will stand and drink crude oil from a pipeline leak until it falls over dead. It then becomes very valuable, albeit deceased, prime breeding stock.
Posted by: Besoeker   2009-12-10 19:30  

#7  Maybe they need a saltlick?
Posted by: CrazyFool   2009-12-10 19:09  

#6  You'd better call Tom and Ray, 746.
Posted by: Eric Jablow   2009-12-10 18:35  

#5  I have had cow licking problems with a Jeep Cherokee. same thing, the cows came around at night and licked the car all over, very strange, we thought it could have been the wax
Posted by: 746   2009-12-10 17:37  

#4  Englishman, you need an f 250 with dual tires and an automatic feeder and an ez loader on the back. Don't forget the hat and the bourbon.
Posted by: bman   2009-12-10 16:38  

#3  People who live in grass houses,
Shouldn't live near on the hoof T-bones.
Posted by: ed   2009-12-10 16:37  

#2  Cows! Why do they hate us?
Posted by: Percy Cleth3546   2009-12-10 16:12  

#1  Actually, this is a real problem. I had something similar happen to my car in England. The local co-op ran a herd of about 50 cows on the pasture surrounding the house I rented. The cows were out one night when I came home from work. Overnight, they broke my radio antenna off, licked the paint in several places down to the primer, and did a job on both side mirrors. It cost me 800 Pounds to have all the damage repaired. The Co-op paid half, I paid half.
Posted by: Old Patriot   2009-12-10 16:06  

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