Yes! It would be an honor to attend to Dear Leader's drool bucket, general!
SEOUL, South Korea (AP) - North Korean leader Kim Jong Il has made his first public appearance in more than a month, a state-run news agency said from Pyongyang on Saturday amid speculation about his health.
Kim watched a university soccer game held to mark the 62nd anniversary of the founding of the university named after his late father, North Korea founder Kim Il Sung, the Korean Central News Agency reported.
The 66-year-old leader had not been seen in public since mid-August, missing two key occasions--the 60th anniversary of the founding of North Korea and Korean Thanksgiving.
Korean Thanksgiving? Oh, the imagery...
U.S. and South Korean officials said Kim suffered a stroke, but North Korean officials steadfastly denied he was ill.
Nope. Just taking some time off to work on the golf game...
Kim's absence from the public eye is believed to be his longest since assuming leadership of communist North Korea after his father's death in 1994. KCNA's last mention of Kim making a public appearance was in mid-August.
Probably visited Pig Farm No. 2617, or the 79th NKPA Goat Milking Battalion. Heard they need on the spot field guidance.
While the reports from Pyongyang had Kim sending greetings to Russian President Dmitry Medvedev and to Chinese leaders, there had been no mention of him appearing in public until Saturday.
Greetings fellow commies. Didn't you know I was sick? Not even a floral basket, you lousy bastids...
The reports said Kim congratulated the two soccer teams from Kim Il Sung University and the Pyongyang University of Railways afterward.
The Kicking Commies vs. The Rambling Wrecks...
Kim praised the student athletes, saying: "The revolutionary and militant students in our country are good at art and sporting activities while devoting all their wisdom and enthusiasm to the study of science for the country and the people," KCNA said.
...and then somebody pulled the wire on his arm and he waved.
The university's 62nd anniversary took place on Oct. 1, but the report did not say when the game was held.