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| Humor test in the context of current events :-) |
| 2006-09-18 |
| The Grizzly Bear The Pope took a couple of days off to visit the mountains of Alaska for some sight-seeing. He was cruising along in the Pope mobile when there was a frantic commotion just at the edge of the woods. A helpless Democrat, wearing sandals, shorts, a "Save the Whales" hat, and a "To Hell with Bush" T-shirt, was screaming while struggling frantically, thrashing around trying to free himself from the grasp of a 10 foot grizzly. As the Pope watched horrified, a group of Republican loggers came racing up. One quickly fired a .44 magnum into the bear's chest... The other two reached up and pulled the bleeding, semiconscious Democrat from the bear's grasp. Then using long clubs, the three loggers finished off the bear and two of them threw it onto the bed of their truck while the another tenderly placed the injured Democrat in the back seat. As they prepared to leave, the Pope summoned them to come over. "I give you my blessing for your brave actions!" he told them. "I heard there was a bitter hatred between Republican loggers and Democratic Environmental activists but now I've seen with my own eyes that this is not true." As the Pope drove off, one of the loggers asked his buddies "Who was that guy?" "It was the Pope," another replied. "He's in direct contact with heaven and has access to all wisdom." "Well," the logger said, "he may have access to all wisdom but he sure doesn't know anything about bear hunting! By the way, how is the bait holding up? Or do we need to go back to Massachusetts and snatch another one?" Did you smile? Yes, You are Republican with a sense of humor No, You are a Democrat with no sense at all |
| Posted by:gorb |
| #15 I wish they use Jacques Chirac as a bait. |
| Posted by: leroidavid 2006-09-18 23:43 |
| #14 Gives it a fishy chicken flavor Mmmmmmm ... Finnish chicken |
| Posted by: Homer 2006-09-18 22:48 |
| #13 pretty common knowledge among us Republicans that you don't taint bear meat with Donk bait. Gives it a fishy chicken flavor |
| Posted by: Frank G 2006-09-18 20:35 |
| #12 Purdy funny tabd. |
| Posted by: 6 2006-09-18 19:43 |
| #11 I laughed, but I still can't call myself a Republican, guys! ;) |
| Posted by: Swamp Blondie 2006-09-18 19:42 |
| #10 BWAAAAAAA!!!!!!!! My side hurts, gotta forward this to bk. |
| Posted by: 49 Pan 2006-09-18 19:02 |
| #9 no - sorry that I didn't put a disclaimer. It was certainly warranted. But glad you got a kick out of it. I sure did. |
| Posted by: tabd 2006-09-18 15:12 |
| #8 Actually, tabd, you did need to tell me -- I've had a very sheltered life, while surrounded by those who haven't. So I've heard some pretty amazing true stories, and I'm not nearly subtle enough to pick up on those that are only tales, much to the quiet amusement of some here. Are you also not a minister? |
| Posted by: trailing wife 2006-09-18 14:57 |
| #7 I probably don't need to tell you this, tw... but just to be sure :-) it wasn't me in the story. It was just for fun. |
| Posted by: tabd 2006-09-18 14:53 |
| #6 thanks. |
| Posted by: tabd 2006-09-18 14:48 |
| #5 Oh, dear, I didn't expect that last bit. tabd, I do hope after all that you eventually found the right burial site. Oh, and I think after hanging out here for a while you'll start to feel better about the world -- it really, really helps to know there are others who understand what's happening, and some of them (mostly the ones who don't comment, actually) are in a position to do something effective about it. Not to mention the pure intellectual pleasure of the Rantburg University bits -- many of the people here are amazingly knowledgeable about the most fascinating things. I haven't said yet, but welcome to you all the new posters who've recently joined this very interesting conversation! |
| Posted by: trailing wife 2006-09-18 14:43 |
| #4 * snigger * Guess I'm not a Democrat either... |
| Posted by: Tony (UK) 2006-09-18 14:23 |
| #3 As a young minister, I was asked by a funeral director to hold a graveside service for a homeless man with no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a newly-established cemetery way back in the country, and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there. As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost and, being a typical man, I did not stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the back-hoe and the crew (which was eating lunch) but the hearse was nowhere in sight. I apologized to the workers for my tardiness and stepped to the side of the open grave where I saw the vault lid was already in place. I assured the workers that I would not hold them up for long, but this was the proper thing to do. The workers all gathered around still eating their lunch. I poured out my heart and soul. As I preached, the workers began to say "Amen," "Praise the Lord," and "Glory." I preached and I preached like I had never preached before-from Genesis to Revelation. I closed the lengthy service with a prayer and walked to my car. As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I heard one of the workers saying to another, "I ain't never seen nothing like that before, and I been puttin' in septic tanks for near twenty years!!! |
| Posted by: tabd 2006-09-18 14:23 |
| #2 ROFLMAO |
| Posted by: DanNY 2006-09-18 14:21 |
| #1 *giggle* I guess I'm not a Democrat. |
| Posted by: trailing wife 2006-09-18 14:10 |