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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Tiger mauls dumbass really schoopid woman at Dublin zoo
2006-07-13
DUBLIN - A young woman was recovering in hospital on Wednesday after being mauled by a tiger at Dublin Zoo.
Tigers -- why do they regard us as food?
Because we're crunchy and taste good with ketchup
The woman and a man, believed to be in their late teens or early 20s, scaled several safety barriers on Tuesday afternoon in an attempt to reach three Siberian tigers in their compound, and finally reached a heavy-mesh fence next to the animals.
"Hey Liam, Kate, hold our ales and watch this!"
“She pushed her hand through and the tiger reacted as any tiger would and bit her,” a zoo spokeswoman said. After receiving first aid, the woman was rushed to hospital by ambulance and underwent emergency surgery on her arm.
She'll be forever known as 'Lefty Linda' in the Irish drinking ballads ...
“I think she was quite lucky to be able to pull back because normally tigers hold on,” said zoo director Leo Oosterweghel. The couple were carrying alcohol in soft drink bottles, “so we can make the assumption their judgment was impaired,” he added.
Leo talks like he's seen this once or twice in his life ...
Posted by:Steve White

#7  "Brilliant!"
Posted by: SLO Jim   2006-07-13 15:32  

#6  Maybe the tiger was just after her "lucky charms".

BTW - going to the Dublin Zoo after a tour of the Guinness factory should be highly discouraged.
Posted by: Broadhead6   2006-07-13 14:09  

#5  The most wonderful things about tiggers is tiggers are wonderful things. And, they will eat pork.
Posted by: wxjames   2006-07-13 13:53  

#4  Tigers, why don;t they like us?
A. Global Warming
B. Hunting
C. President Bush
D. American Idol
E. Starbucks
F. All of the Above

Isn't D and E enough to hate ourselves? I can see why the tigers want to bite our hands off.
Posted by: Charles   2006-07-13 12:08  

#3  The woman and a man, believed to be in their late teens or early 20s, scaled several safety barriers on Tuesday afternoon in an attempt to reach three Siberian tigers in their compound, and finally reached a heavy-mesh fence next to the animals.

Probably a follower of Princeton U professor Peter Singer and the Animals Are People Too Movement!

Tigers, why don;t they like us?
A. Global Warming
B. Hunting
C. President Bush
D. American Idol
E. Starbucks
F. All of the Above
Posted by: Lancasters Over Dresden   2006-07-13 09:42  

#2  "What happened to you?"

"Spotted snakes."
Posted by: mojo   2006-07-13 01:27  

#1  normally tigers hold on

Tiger: "This doesn't taste like chicken!!! Phooey!!!"
Posted by: 2Ducks   2006-07-13 00:45  

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