You have commented 339 times on Rantburg.

Your Name
Your e-mail (optional)
Website (optional)
My Original Nic        Pic-a-Nic        Sorry. Comments have been closed on this article.
Bold Italic Underline Strike Bullet Blockquote Small Big Link Squish Foto Photo
Submit your comments on this article
Arabia
First Islamic satellite will go into orbit in 15 months
2004-12-27
Clue #1,874 as to why these people are hopeless.
The first Islamic satellite, expected to be used in the crescent sighting, will go into orbit in 15 months' time, with the launch planed for 2006, according to Dr Omar Al Khateeb, Head of Research and Fatwa Section, who represented the UAE at the Satellite committee meeting held in Cairo on December 21. In an interview with Khaleej Times, Dr Al Khateeb said that the project was proposed by Dar Al Ifta in Egypt in 1997. "The satellite is expected to present a solution to the problem resulted from the differences over the lunar months — a fact which prompted Arab and Muslim countries to support the project," Al Khateeb, pointed out.
As opposed to just contracting with the US or Eurosat for a lunar sighting every year. Cheez.
He added that the committee, which comprises Arab Islamic scholars, representatives  of Organisation of Islamic Conference (OIC)  and the Muslim World League, reached an agreement to put to tender the manufacturing of the satellite in January 2005. The tendering would take place in cooperation with the Cairo University's Space Studies Centre (CUSSC). Al Khateeb explained that moon sighting has always been a controversial issue among Muslim countries, and scholars have different views over the issue. "Many scholars believe that Muslims in different countries should follow one sighting as long as the sightings are made on the same night in these countries. While others believe that Muslims worldwide should abide by the lunar calendar of Saudi Arabia," he said. Al Khateeb explained that the launch of the Islamic satellite project would present a solution to this controversial problem.
Oh, no doubt.
Posted by:Steve White

#36  Welcome aboard, trailing daughter!
Posted by: Zenster   2004-12-28 12:02:10 AM  

#35  I'd like to offer a belated welcome to Trailing Daughter as well.

Alas, I have no cinnamon buns to offer a proper welcome.
Posted by: Phil Fraering   2004-12-27 11:59:36 PM  

#34  Nice to meet you, trailing daughter!
Posted by: Seafarious   2004-12-27 11:57:24 PM  

#33  Well met, Trailing Daughter! Grab yerself a terminal and pull up to the bar. We're in for a wild ride.
Posted by: Asedwich   2004-12-27 11:34:26 PM  

#32  With a little adroit manipulation, we could have them bowing down and praying toward Disneyland.
Posted by: Atomic Conspiracy   2004-12-27 11:31:16 PM  

#31  ;-) just teasing, of course
Posted by: Frank G   2004-12-27 11:16:08 PM  

#30  But we do too let Mr. Wife be in charge whenever he wants! And who on earth would want to pretend to be us, when there are so many more exciting people to impersonate? Murat, f'r instance, or .com ...
Posted by: trailing wife   2004-12-27 10:59:03 PM  

#29  He buys me cinnamon buns!
Posted by: trailing daughter of the trailing wife   2004-12-27 10:54:57 PM  

#28  I have a hunch that the individual out in front of the trailing family really isn't the one in charge...
Posted by: Classical_Liberal   2004-12-27 10:48:31 PM  

#27  wait a minute! How do I know you're not just Kleagle Thrumptor trying to hide as TW and kin?
Posted by: Frank G   2004-12-27 10:46:32 PM  

#26  May I introduce my elder daughter? She is the one who peeks over my shoulder as I scroll through the site, giggling madly along with me (and offering what she thinks of as sarcastic comments, tee hee!).
Posted by: trailing wife   2004-12-27 10:42:08 PM  

#25  Aren't they already called to prayer about 800 times a day?

Oops, I miscounted. Ah well, 5, 800, not a big difference there...
Posted by: trailing daughter of the trailing wife   2004-12-27 10:37:59 PM  

#24  Can we fix the thing to call them to prayers about 800 times a day?
Posted by: tu3031   2004-12-27 8:28:51 PM  

#23  Thanks Frank! :) I like to encourage mischief anywhere I can...
Posted by: Asedwich   2004-12-27 8:07:53 PM  

#22   Ramadan 5 months in a row?

now that's a nice touch Asedwich!
Posted by: Frank G   2004-12-27 7:48:46 PM  

#21  Would the Islamic Satellite (piss be upon it) be infallible?
Wouldn't it be fun to rig a directional array and hack it? How do you figure Mooslimbs would like to have Ramadan 5 months in a row?
Posted by: Asedwich   2004-12-27 7:44:29 PM  

#20  You guys are just MEAN!!
Posted by: Weird Al   2004-12-27 6:58:32 PM  

#19  Rumor has it that their next effort will involve building a high-power field effect electron microscope to determine exactly how many angels can dance on the head of a hand grenade pin.
Posted by: Zenster   2004-12-27 6:19:19 PM  

#18  DO I believe you have a future in ME battle management.
Posted by: Shipman   2004-12-27 6:17:48 PM  

#17  Better yet. Let's form a Rantburg Space Division and bid the job. We could underbid anyone else and pocket the $8 million or so, because our implementation would be a PC simulation of a sattellite which would report crescent moon sightings for a few months, then mysteriously die due to incorrect commands being sent by the inept ground controllers in SA or Egypt. Nearly $8 mil in pure profit...
Posted by: DO   2004-12-27 12:00:11 PM  

#16  #4, I suspect there are lots of French and other officials willing to help the Muslim world build and operate this thing. And I don't think the real reason for them wanting satellites is to check on moonrise timing.
Posted by: too true   2004-12-27 11:29:05 AM  

#15  Fatwas generators already exist - they just go by many names (mullahs, imams, sheiks, etc.). Unfortunately, it's a growth industry.
Posted by: Spot   2004-12-27 11:14:01 AM  

#14  Wait,
you aint seen nothin' yet

We proudly present the new "Stochastic Fatwa generator" from the same fatwa section in collaboration with Al-Azhar Islamic University.

You provide the target and it will autmatically
and effortlessly generate the Fatwa.

orders are now being accepted (Cash Only).
Posted by: throllong Dumbeh 119   2004-12-27 10:06:01 AM  

#13  Special news edition!!!

Reliable Mossad sources reveal that the new Islamic Satellite will be powered by a new Islamic technology " the "Camel Dung Operated Islamic Power generator".

Glory Be to Allah !
Posted by: EoZ   2004-12-27 10:00:14 AM  

#12  Seriously,
At least in the near future the Islamic countries can save a lot of money by simply renting space for Monrise detection cameras on US Cruise Missiles headed for Iran's Nuclear sites.
The commercial opportunities are enticing.....
Posted by: EoZ   2004-12-27 9:54:33 AM  

#11  Direc(from Allan)TV
Posted by: Frank G   2004-12-27 9:51:24 AM  

#10  P.S.S

Truely, this could turn into a whole new industry.
For Example, just consider the immense clerical possibilities of the "Anti-Satelite Fatwa(TM)".
This could give the retards an entire religious renaissance !
From now on we swear only by "Muhammad PBUH and his Islamic Satelite"
Posted by: EoZ   2004-12-27 9:38:30 AM  

#9  Baaah, baaaah, baaaah, baaaaah
Posted by: abu Sputnik   2004-12-27 9:34:45 AM  

#8  P.S.
The Scientific progress of the Islamics is mind-boggling.
We will soon also encounter "High-Tech Fatwas"
from the same Fatwa section.....
That's what I call scientific spin-off :)
Posted by: EoZ   2004-12-27 9:32:06 AM  

#7  The advantages of Islamic communication satellite --- watch execution of infidels on live show?
Posted by: gromgorru   2004-12-27 9:30:20 AM  

#6  Gentlemen Please calm down.
The "Islamic Satelite" will never Happen.
The Shiites will issue a Fatwa(TM) against any Sunny Satelite and the Sunny's will never tolerate a Shiite Satelite.

Question : how can you tell between a true "Islamic Satelite" and a regular "Dhimmi Satelite ??

Answer : The "Islamic satelite" turns towards Mecca 5 times a day.
Posted by: EoZ   2004-12-27 9:28:38 AM  

#5  Dr Omar Al Khateeb, Head of Research and Fatwa Section
Now that gives me confidence! Is he researching fatwas or are fatwas considered the same as research? Something tells me that this is the same as firing guns into the air, just with larger "bullets" - it's gonna come down somewhere soon, watch your head!
Posted by: Spot   2004-12-27 9:13:00 AM  

#4  So who will build and launch this satellite? Who will build the ground stations? Who will maintain the ground stations? Oh, I guess that be the west. Let me get this straight: the Muslims will use the technology and infrastructure of the Great Satan or its underlings to help determine the beginning of their holy days. Ironic isn’t it. Muslim leaders want the benefits of modern society to settle their religious disputes but cannot allow those same institutions to exist within their society without loosing their power.
Posted by: Flaiting Slang1198   2004-12-27 8:04:18 AM  

#3  It's worse than that Cheaderhead. The early aarabs were pretty good visual astronomers and had a fair grasp of stealler and solar motion....

They went with a lunar calendar in spite of their knowledge.... somethings don't change.
Posted by: Shipman   2004-12-27 6:39:36 AM  

#2  Haven't they found out that the Earth is not the center of the universe and that Lunar calendars are not an accurate time measure.
Posted by: Cheaderhead   2004-12-27 6:25:50 AM  

#1  ROFL! Cool. This can be a live-fire exercise drone for one of anti-sat programs. Hell, we should offer to underwrite a portion so they can send up several - we need a solid test program. We have to test an array of interceptor missiles, as well as airborne, space-based, and ground-based beam weapons. We could even work on a capture, reprogram, and release sequence... much like the way that Islamic countries deal with terrorists, only they seem to skip the reprogram step.

The moon-cult morons could get any phreakin' moon-phase info they need from USA Today, but they're all wrapped up in superstitious mumbo-fucko gobbledy-gook and tell the dopey True Believers that only the "scholars" can deal with their ultra-trivial celestial issues. Those who've lived in places like Saudi and had to deal with the absurdly annoying prayer schedules and the silly annual brouhaha over when phreakin' Ramadan starts know precisely what I mean.

Islamic satellite. Yeah, sure thing - good idea. You don't teach basic health in school so grown men and women don't know which hole makes a baby, but you need a satellite - jointly controlled from Mekkah (LOL!) for the Mullahs. Perfect.
Posted by: .com   2004-12-27 2:43:22 AM  

00:00