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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Monster Thickburger, Yummmmm!
2004-11-18
America's appetite for junk food has taken on terrifying new proportions in the form of the highest calorie hamburger ever marketed to a nation already sick from overeating.
Speak for yourself
The "Monster Thickburger" is nothing less than a "monument to decadence", declares Hardee's, the chain pandering to the country's worst instincts for greed and gluttony.
It's called giving your customers a choice.
The burger, which packs a bulging 1,420 calories and 107 grams of fat per portion, also bucks the trend of fast-food restaurants offering healthier alternatives. "It's not a burger for tree-huggers," said a Hardee's executive, rejoicing in their defiance of the fad for salads and "Atkins-friendly" menus. "It's a lot," one bloated diner said after surviving the challenge of eating one in Pennsylvania. "It tastes better than you might suspect. But I think it's a special treat more than a regular meal." The Monster Thickburger consists of two slabs of Angus beef (664 calories) and four rashers of bacon (150 calories) with three slices of processed cheese (186 calories), plus mayonnaise (160 calories), sandwiched between a sesame seed bun (230 calories) spread with butter for a final 30.
Damm, that sounds good.
The equivalent of two Big Macs, it costs $7. For around $2 more, you can throw in a medium fries and a soft drink and consume an adult's recommended daily intake of calories at one sitting. The burger requires "two hands, a firm grip and a serious appetite", Hardee's boasts. It is also a "heart attack in a bun", say nutritionists. The company is not as widely spread in America as McDonald's or Burger King. But by gambling on bigger burgers, it is earning notoriety - and market buzz. However, it also increases the company's exposure to the threat of lawsuits from customers blaming its food for their obesity, diabetes, heart problems or other conditions linked to poor diet. Attempts to sue McDonald's for health problems have so far failed, but the litigation threat is still taken seriously. Hardee's previous attempt to seduce big eaters was the plain Thickburger. "If the old Thickburger was 'food porn', the new Monster Thickburger is the fast-food equivalent of a snuff movie," the Centre for Science in the Public Interest commented.
Oh, bite me
Posted by:Steve

#9  Seafarious---ROTFLMAO!!!!!

If you or I ate two a day for a week, we would be big enough to burn diesel! LOL!
Posted by: Alaska Paul   2004-11-18 4:13:03 PM  

#8  the chain pandering to the country's worst instincts for greed and gluttony

Um, no. That would be the various casino chains, thank you.

As for CSPI -- last I checked, "they" were a fax machine and a couple of the Perpetually Incensed.
Posted by: Robert Crawford   2004-11-18 3:26:09 PM  

#7  In your piehole
Past the gums
Look out arteries
Here it comes!
Posted by: Seafarious   2004-11-18 3:21:09 PM  

#6  have it with a side of fried zucchini and a diet coke - it's now a "healthy" meal!
Posted by: Frank G   2004-11-18 3:18:32 PM  

#5  Lol, Steve - great heads-up! I'm headed out for a printer cable - now I'll have to stop by Carl's Jr (weird incestuous relationship with Hardee's) on the way home to see if they have it on the menu, yet, lol! "Snuff movie" did it, for me... Thanx for the hat tip, CSPI!
Posted by: .com   2004-11-18 3:18:18 PM  

#4  the two slabs of Angus beef sound great , the rest sounds 'orrible ! , oooh wait a minute .. the four rashers of bacon sound great too :)

what was that about Atkins again ?! :)
Posted by: MacNails   2004-11-18 3:08:10 PM  

#3  Quitcher bellyaching. You haven't even seen the combo yet.
Posted by: BH   2004-11-18 1:54:43 PM  

#2  Python: "just try a thin mint, it's waaaaafer-thin"
Posted by: Frank G   2004-11-18 1:13:44 PM  

#1  It's the Center for "Science" in the "Public" Interest.

Scare quotes are necessary for the CSPI.
Posted by: jackal   2004-11-18 1:12:43 PM  

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