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| Home Front: Politix |
| Maybe Steyns' best yet? --- Whoa -- his site.... no editors.... |
| 2004-09-22 |
| Full article -- it's too good to click to read "the rest of the story"... enjoy... THE KERRYNESS OF KERRY If I've been following the campaign correctly, the typical John Kerry day involves an early-morning stop at Bud's Truck Stop on Rte 103 at which the Senator orders a hot dog. Asked what he wants on it, he says an aubergine and lemongrass coulis. Afterwards, he heads to Idaho for a windsurfing photo-op to communicate his virility, after first flying out his stylist from Cristophe's to mousse his hair into its windswept and tousled position. Following questions from the press on the cost of his hairdresser, he first denies that he has a hairdresser and then, when her curling tongs and rollers are pointed out in the back of his family's SUV, snaps, "She's not my hairdresser, she's the family's hairdresser." Later, after a two-man luge run with his Secret Service agent ends with him falling off after 50 yards, he snarls, "I don't fall off. That sonofabitch agent arched his back too high." Conceding that he was never in Cambodia on Christmas Eve 1968, the Senator says that those words were repeatedly placed in his mouth by over-zealous speechwriters. He wasn't in Cambodia, his wife's first husband's corporation's wholly owned subsidiary was in Cambodia. "But if George W Bush's Republican smear machine wants to make our service in Vietnam an issue, I say to them: BRING. IT. ON!"The day ends with the Senator throwing the first pitch at the Red Sox game. It lands on his red sock and breaks his toe, resulting in him taking two weeks off for surgery, in the course of which his numbers go up four points. |
| Posted by:Sherry |
| #13 football, nascar, hockey, pbr, deer hunting - oh hell yeah - the redneck in me is drooling like pavlov's dog. |
| Posted by: Jarhead 2004-09-22 9:52:02 PM |
| #12 trailing wife, in the spring you must watch the Daytona 500. From start to finish. Try to pick your favorites as the race goes on. After that, you'll be down wit dat, promise. Football, they only play once a week and teams only play each other only once or twice a year, therforelosing last all week/year. So losing isn't cool. In fact, it's quite painful. Now don't forget, springtime, Daytona 500 watch the whole thing. B Issacs, it's obscene, crazy racing! |
| Posted by: Lucky 2004-09-22 9:37:54 PM |
| #11 I used to like NASCAR too! But God in Heaven! You ever actually see how fast those 3500 lbs pieces of thin steel are moving? I just washed my hands of the whole thing, forget it. |
| Posted by: B Issacs 2004-09-22 7:47:49 PM |
| #10 We used to like NASCAR but hellfire they wouldn't let us run our OHC 427. I blame it on cattuah. |
| Posted by: Holman & Moody 2004-09-22 7:45:57 PM |
| #9 NASCAR, football, baseball -- I appreciate all, but follow only baseball... Oh S***, The DODGERS are choking AGAIN! |
| Posted by: BigEd 2004-09-22 3:57:17 PM |
| #8 Lucky, you were right the first time. And I'm afraid that I, amongst us, am completely puzzled about the attraction of loud, stinking vehicles travelling for hours without getting anywhere. But then, I don't get American football or baseball, either. Please forgive me? |
| Posted by: trailing wife 2004-09-22 1:58:12 PM |
| #7 Who among us doesn't like NASCAR? Ooops, Whom, among us, doesn't like NASCAR? Er wait, whom amongst us... |
| Posted by: Lucky 2004-09-22 1:29:15 PM |
| #6 Howard Dean was a dull centrist governor pretending to be nuts, John Kerry is a nut passing himself off as a dull centrist. At this point I had to get up and go to the restroom. I was laughing so hard, I was afraid my fellow cubicle prarie-dogs would call 9-1-1 and cart me away... |
| Posted by: BigEd 2004-09-22 12:28:26 PM |
| #5 Won't change the opinions of anyone who's a rabid Kerry supporter Doc, I think that's Kerry's main problem: there are no rabid Kerry supporters. Just rabid Bush haters. |
| Posted by: Dreadnought 2004-09-22 11:55:21 AM |
| #4 âA vain thin-skinned droning blueblood with an indestructible sense of his own status but none at all of his own ridiculousness.â âJohn Kerry is a nut passing himself off as a dull centrist.â âNever in the field of human conflict was so much made of so few by so many.â (Kerryâs Mekong experience) Wow, he captured the complete Kerry and Theresa too! |
| Posted by: Cyber Sarge 2004-09-22 11:10:09 AM |
| #3 That was simply great. Won't change the opinions of anyone who's a rabid Kerry supporter, but nothing's perfect. Beautiful! |
| Posted by: The Doctor 2004-09-22 10:23:47 AM |
| #2 What a hoot! That was my favorite (of many) too. "That was no lady, that was my Momma T meal ticket." |
| Posted by: Capt America 2004-09-22 3:33:55 AM |
| #1 Well -- maybe this is my favorite paragraph.... For most of us this would be more than enough to see us through November: Why did John Kerry cross the road? âI crossed the road to volunteer for Vietnam. Some of us know something about what it means to cross the road.â Who was that lady I saw you with last night? âThat was no lady, that was my meal ticket.â How many John Kerrys does it take to change a lightbulb? At least four. One to approve the removal of the old lightbulb. One to declare his courageous commitment to replacing the old bulb. One to vote against funding the new lightbulb. And one to denounce George W Bush and Americaâs Benedict Arnold CEOs for leaving everyone in the dark. |
| Posted by: Sherry 2004-09-22 2:21:17 AM |