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Iraq
Blix Wants Inspectors in Iraq
2003-04-17
The chief U.N. weapons inspector for Iraq urged the U.S.-led coalition to allow his team back into the country to look for weapons of mass destruction, saying that would increase the credibility of any discoveries, a magazine reported Thursday.
”I KNOW I can do it this time guys! Lemme at ‘em! Come on, PUHLEEEEAZ?”
Hans Blix, who is a bufoon was in charge of searches for chemical and biological weapons and long-range missiles in Iraq, also challenged President Bush's administration to present proof of its allegation that Syria has chemical weapons. "Whoever claims this should, in the interests of credibility, very quickly present the relevant proof," Blix said in an interview with the German weekly Der Spiegel. "For my part, I doubt that the Syrians would have been enthusiastic to serve as a depot of weapons of mass destruction for Baghdad."
And your opinion is SO relevant at this point!
The Bush administration, which blamed Blix for hampering its drive to win international support for war, has not invited U.N. detractors inspectors to take part in disarming postwar Iraq. Instead, the United States has tried to hire away some inspectors and has deployed its own teams to search for weapons of mass destruction. Blix said internationally backed inspections would have "considerably more credibility."
Insert GUFFAW here
"The alliance came as liberator and occupier, and that can prove to be a disadvantage," he told the magazine. "If its experts now should really discover weapons of mass destruction, their authenticity might be called into question."
Reports on Iraqi weapons programs that the inspectors received from intelligence agencies were "pretty pathetic" and led to no discoveries of weapons of mass destruction, Blix said.
Pathetic?? Said the pot to the kettle
The chief nuclear weapons inspector, Mohamed ElBaradei, even received forged documents meant to persuade the inspectors that Iraq had nuclear weapons ambitions, Blix said. He gave no details. Blix, who has been invited to brief the U.N. Security Council on April 22, called for efforts to declare the entire Middle East free of weapons of mass destruction, "naturally including Israel."
Naturally
Israel is widely believed to have nuclear weapons, though it has not officially acknowledged having them.

You're right that Blix should be wearing a 4-pointed hat and carrying a slapstick, but he has a point. As soon as they do turn up, the lefties will be crying loudly that we planted them, and the Arabs (and Paks) will be even louder. So the best thing would be to invite all comers, with appropriate prizes for the biggest finds.

So grab Grandma and the kids and come on down to al-Kut for the year's biggest chemical weapons hunt! Free gas masks for the ladies!

All children under six must be fitted with a radiometer.

Posted by:Samma-lamma

#13  Actually, Blix is a contracted employee whose contract runs through June... sorta like a Temp.
Project over, Hans. Good Bye.
Posted by: Capsu78   2003-04-17 16:15:33  

#12  Methinks Blix beleieves he needs a few more days on the job to qualify for unemployment. Problem is, he's being fired for just cause.
Posted by: Anonymous   2003-04-17 15:32:43  

#11  Or, hell, let's give Tim Robbins a metal detector and a Geiger counter and tell him not to bug us until he's checked every square foot of Iraq.
Posted by: FormerLiberal   2003-04-17 14:32:37  

#10  If this is the case, why not bring Richard Butler in to coordinate the search for the WMDs?
Posted by: Bomb-a-rama   2003-04-17 14:23:14  

#9  IIUC some of the people the coalition has looking for WMD are former UNSCOM (the inspection team that preceded Blix and UNMOVIC) employees - so this is clearly not a question of technical expertise. Its a question of trust. Which obviously runs both ways.
Posted by: liberalhawk   2003-04-17 14:03:07  

#8  At this point Blix is a mere gadfly. His buzzing, though, serves to illustrate that one of the many benefits of this war has been to shine a very, very bright light on that parallel universe known as the UN. It was at first disconcerting to discover to learn how little friendship we actually enjoyed among "old Europe." The Marshall Plan, it turns out, was just one more thing for them to hate us for, even while they did better by it than they could have ever have done without it. It's a little like getting out of the hospital and then swearing at the boy scout who was rude enough to save his life. "Sure, both my legs were cut off and I was bleeding to death," says old Europe. "But you're just a damn kid!" As if it mattered.

Well, sorry, Europe. You may have been able to comfort yourself in the notion that where the United States had power and vigor and the recklessness of a kid with Attention Deficit Disorder, Europe had culture, age, wisdom, manners, elan, and etc.

How it must be killing you, old Europe, to realize that you really *are* old, and in the worst sense of the word, confined to an Old Folk's Home of your own making and obliged to notice how the kid who stole the car keys 220 years ago ian't a kid anymore. Worse, we do everything better. That's got to make your rickety legs and swollen knees hurt!

True, our manners could be better, but on the other hand, who actually wants better manners? In Europe manners have nothing to do with politeness and mutual respect, but with scoring points on the poor slob who doesn't know which fork to use. It's the legacy of centuries of mincing court life, vicious class distinction, and it's a way of feeling better at the expense of someone else. You do it by sneering about how culturally pathetic the Unites States are, we do it by winning your wars.

So I guess what I really want to say to Blix is "Fuck you AND the (UN) horse you rode in on."

Yeah, we've grown up, but I'm glad we didn't shed our talent for profanity in the process.
Posted by: FormerLiberal   2003-04-17 12:47:12  

#7  Global Warming Alert! Global Warming Alert! Blixie blowing wind!

We are doing the right thing. When a dog dies, a dog dies hard. Wish Blixie a good morning and keep on with the tasks at hand. We are not in Iraq to please the press, we are there to interrupt the terror cycle and to insure that there is no more WMD on that bit of real estate. We will let Mr. Powell have the job of telling the UN to GTFO, in diplmatically acceptable language, of course.
Posted by: Alaska Paul   2003-04-17 12:42:01  

#6  You just KNOW that if the British or the U.S. find anything in Iraq, opponents of the invasion are just going to say they planted it there. That is guaranteed. They'll cling to the fantasy in the face of irrefutable evidence. Which brings to mind: I'm new to Rantburg and you may have already discussed this, but are any of you familiar with the French bestseller that argued that 9/11 was the work of the CIA/Pentagon? Just shows you how wigged-out they can be.
Posted by: joe   2003-04-17 12:11:05  

#5  Let us do something totally rational for a change. Let's tell the United Nations to get lost. Literally. Go find another place to stink up. And don't tell us where, as long as it's not the US, Great Britain, Australia, Poland, Spain, Italy, Latvia, Albania, etc., ect. Just go. You have until Monday morning. After that, the building you currently inhabit will be the new headquarters of the 1MEF. Happy hunting.
Posted by: Old Patriot   2003-04-17 12:33:22  

#4  Times of London:

"Russia said today that it would not support the lifting of sanctions unless it was confirmed that Iraq had no weapons of mass destruction."

If iraq had WMD - the US was right.
If Iraq had no WMD - there's no reason to maintain sanctions.
So - Russia "theres no evidence of WMD, but we can only lift sanctions when theres proof of no WMD"

It must be hard to write satire, when the world is this absurd.

One


Posted by: liberalhawk   2003-04-17 12:07:16  

#3  Somehow we've allowed the UN to get the notion that it is "in charge" of everything in the world; that no nation may act outside its borders without the UN's permission; and that the UN is the font of all "credibility" in the universe.

Me, I'd like nothing better than to see a column of M1A1 Abrams tanks rolling down 1st Avenue on their way to putting an abrupt stop to that nonsense.

Buzz off, Blixie. Take your useless inspectors and shove 'em.
Posted by: Dave D.   2003-04-17 12:05:14  

#2  "If its experts now should really discover weapons of mass destruction, their authenticity might be called into question."
-As opposed to the "expert UN team" who couldn't find their butts with both hands!?!
Posted by: lamma's_mamma   2003-04-17 11:59:15  

#1  Earth to Blixie: We have inspectors in Iraq - they're called the U.S. and British military. Get over yourself!
Posted by: Barbara Skolaut   2003-04-17 11:16:28  

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